Episode 3.10, Making Choices, Part 1 ------------------------------------ At School The frog jokes were almost over, but to Joan’s dismay, The Eagle was published today. ‘Frog Terrorizes Classroom,’ catchy title, so much for accuracy, and they just had to put in the observation that Joan had leaped after the frog while trying to catch it. Oh well. Joan and Adam talked before school about their planned Saturday trip to Mercer Creek, and she keeps her mind busy anticipating Saturday. Luke has been in a foul mood today. Grace’s mood hasn’t been much better, and Joan has been wondering why. Did something happen yesterday? She has been meaning to ask, thinking that she should mind her own business, and struggling with which one to do. In Government class, the teacher was discussing the 17th Amendment and the popular election of Senators. Grace – “That’s pretty much like what happens with the elections here at Arcadia High. It’s just one big popularity contest. I heard Britney Johnson say this morning, ‘Jim Barlow is so handsome, I’m going to vote for him’. Jim Barlow barely graduated last year. He should be a specimen in our biology class for exploratory brain surgery.” Joan – “Brian is running again. He has a ten-point plan this year. Some of his ideas are pretty good.” Grace – “He doesn’t have a chance of winning. No one listens to him.” Teacher – “Well, I’m glad at least some of you have been paying attention. Here is your assignment. Each of you will pick a candidate and write an essay on why you support him or her for Student Council President. It has to be at least two paragraphs long and no longer than about two handwritten pages. They are due on Monday. I will turn them over to The Eagle staff, and they will be published in a special edition on Wednesday. Here’s your chance to tell everyone what you think.” Almost everyone in class moans in unison as the bell rings. Grace – “So, what’s with you and Brian? You don’t even like him.” Joan – “He is a jerk sometimes, but sometimes he’s not. I heard how he organized a search party when everyone thought I was kidnapped. He didn’t have to do that.” Grace – “So, this is payback?” Joan – “No, it’s more than that. What he did showed leadership, and he’s the only one with a plan. He’s the only one who might make a difference.” Grace – “Does this mean you’ll be his campaign manager again this year?” Joan – “Yeah, well, he asked me. Why don’t you get some more copies of his plan, and we can meet at my house after school. You can read it, we can do our homework, and then talk about our essays. If you decide you want to vote for someone else, that’s fine.” Grace – “Elmer Fudd still sounds good to me.” Joan – “Then you’ll have no effect at all.” At the Police Station Will is in his office reading the background check he had done on Brother Jimi. ‘James Earl Johnson, born January 7, 1976 in Arcadia, MD, the son of James and Alma Johnson, both deceased. Enlisted in the Army on June 5, 1994. Wounded in action November 10, 2001, honorably discharged disabled January 25, 2002. Returned to Arcadia in February 2002. Received his ministry from the Baptist Missionary Alliance in November 2003. He is presently the pastor at the Church of Hope on Broad Street . Other activities: Manages the Arcadia Soup Kitchen (ASK) on Walnot Street , and teaches basketball at the YMCA twice a week. Participates in numerous other charities.’ Will greets brother Jimi when he arrives for their meeting, “Come in and have a seat.” Will closes the door and returns to his seat, “I had a background check done on you. You have had an impressive career.” Brother Jimi – “Background check? I don’t know if I like the sound of that coming from the Chief of Police.” Will – “I just need to know who I’m dealing with. I was handed dealing with Hunter’s Watchdog Committee, and I want to make sure I am making the right decision by initiating dealings with yours. The report doesn’t indicate any problems. In fact, I was quite surprised to learn that you were in the army.” Brother Jimi – “That was a lifetime ago. I did my duty to country, now I’m doing my duty to God.” Will – “It says you were discharged disabled. You appear to be in good shape. Would you mind my asking why you were discharged?” Brother Jimi – “There was a bullet with my name on it. I truly believe that God was trying to tell me something. I lost a kidney, but God willing, I’ll continue doing fine on the other one.” Will – “Well, thank you for your service, both then and now.” Brother Jimi – “I have the information that you requested.” He hands Will a paper, “These are the proposed members of the committee. They are all fine men and women.” Will – “Thank you. I’ll get back to you as soon as my investigation is complete. Here is a background check done on me.” Brother Jimi looks at the report, “What was the information that has been deleted?” Will – “Information about my family. I don’t feel you need to know that.” Brother Jimi – “I met Joan the other day. She’s a nice girl. Is she your daughter?” Will – “Yes, she told me about returning the money from the fund raiser.” Brother Jimi – “Well, tell her hello for me.” Will and Brother Jimi shake hands and Brother Jimi departs. At the Newspaper Kevin asks Rebecca to come to his desk, “Why is this story flagged for deletion?” Rebecca – “Pressure from above. Hunter feels it would be seen as politically motivated.” Kevin – “Not running the story would be just as politically motivated. We both know why he doesn’t want it published.” Rebecca – “He has threatened my job. It’s just one story.” Kevin – “And what about the next one and the one after that?” Rebecca – “I’ve worked hard to get where I am. I can’t risk it.” Kevin – “Well, we can let this one go, but if Hunter keeps it up, we can’t continue to pander to his whim.” Rebecca – “I know, I have to do some more thinking.” Rebecca leaves and Kevin calls Henry Taschen with the Free Press. After he received assurance of anonymity, Kevin archives a copy of the story to CD. He will e-mail the story from home later. At School Grace – “Are you ready for the mystery meat today?” Joan – “No, I brought a sandwich. I’m going to eat it out on the bleachers.” Grace – “Split it with me, and I’ll join you.” Joan – “Not today, I kind of want to be alone. Besides, you need to find Brian and get more copies of his plan.” Joan leaves and begins to walk down the hall. Custodian God meets her and hands her a shovel, “You can bring it back on Monday.” Joan – “I know you know my thoughts, but this is becoming too weird! Next time, just let me come and get the shovel.” God smiles and departs with a wave. Joan walks out to the bleachers and sits to eat her sandwich. She wonders about Judith. It has been so long since she has seen her, dead or alive. Judith told her the\ `crocuses `__\ were a Dutch hybrid. The huge white flowers were so beautiful when they bloomed last spring, that is, until someone trampled them. That’s why she decided to return today. She finishes her sandwich and walks under the bleachers. She finds the red X she had marked under the bench, just above where the crocuses had bloomed. She starts to dig, ‘Five bulbs, not bad! Now I’ll take you to a good home.’ At the Police Station Toni rushes into Will’s office, “We have shots fired and possibly two officers down in Meadow Park.” Will – “Do we know who they are?” Toni – “Not yet, it was just called in by a witness at the scene. A unit is on the way.” Will – “Have Mike and Carlisle get to the scene. Have the officers responding call me on my cell as soon as they can with an ID on the two officers and their condition.” Toni leaves and Will calls Helen’s cell. She doesn’t answer. He looks up the number for the school office and makes the call. At School Grace subjected herself to the mystery meat for lunch and went to find Brian afterward. She found him in the office, and they agreed to go to his locker to get more copies of his plan. As they were about to leave, news that two police officers had been shot came over the radio. She hears over the PA, “Mrs. Girardi, please come to the office for a phone call.” Grace assumes the worst and tells Brian to drop off the copies in the office. She’ll pick them up later. She goes out and meets Joan coming back from the bleachers, “I found five crocus bulbs. Isn’t that neat?” Grace – “Yeah, great, we need to go to the office. You need to sign up as Brian’s campaign manager.” Joan – “Sign up, since when? It’s not like we’re a political party.” Grace – “Come on, don’t argue, just come with me.” When they arrive in the office, they see Helen finishing her call. Helen walks over to Joan and Grace, “Hi Grace. Joan, that was your father. He’ll be working late tonight, but he still wants me to go ahead and meet with June. I’ll leave money for you to order pizza or something. Will you tell Luke?” Joan – “Yeah, sure, where do I sign up to be campaign manager?” Grace interrupts, “Never mind, we need to get to class.” Joan hands Helen the shovel, “Can you put this in your room? I’ll pick it up after school.” Helen thinks to herself, ‘I’m not going to ask,’ and simply responds, “Sure.” Joan and Grace leave, and Helen calls Kevin to let him know that Will is all right. As Grace and Joan head to class, they meet Luke hurrying toward them, “I just heard about the two police officers being shot. Do you know anything?” Grace – “Your dad is fine. He just called and said he’ll be working late.” Joan stands stunned for a moment and then realizes what Grace had done, “Thank you, Grace.” They continue to class. At the Police Station Will’s cell phone rings, “Hello Chief, this is Officer Cheney. Officer Philips and I were the first on the scene here at Meadow Park. The two officers involved are Officer Turner and Officer Garcia. There were also two others involved, Anthony Rizzo and Theodore Marks. Officers Turner and Rizzo are dead. Officer Garcia and Theodore Marks have been taken to UMC with gunshot wounds.” Will – “Okay, call me back as soon as Detectives Daghlian and Carlisle arrive.” Will looks up Officer Garcia’s profile on the computer, ‘Married, wife Sophia, homemaker, three children…’ He prints out the information. He then looks up Officer Turner’s profile, ‘Single, parents are Luke and Cynthia Turner…” He prints out that information as well. He pauses for a moment as he prepares himself for the tasks he must now perform, telling Mrs. Garcia of her husband’s injuries, and notifying Mr. and Mrs. Turner of their daughter’s death. At School Grace and Joan are heading for their last period class, “So, when are you going to tell me what you and Ms. Keady have been up to?” Joan – “We are still working on it. It’s a surprise, I told you.” Grace – “It sure sounds clandestine! Oh, the keylogger is going in tonight. I got it from Luke yesterday and my dad is getting it to the guy today.” Joan – “Is that going to do any good? Do they even work over the weekend?” Grace – “Not normally, but the cleaning guy said they are having a big powwow this weekend, probably on account of what your dad did this week.” Joan – “Okay, now we hold our breath until Monday.” Joan goes to the gym and begins her warm up routine. She has created a blend of yoga, dance, and martial arts exercises. Normally, Joan does her routine silently, but today she decides to tell Ms. Keady about her idea, “I made up an excuse for why I am spending time with you. I told Grace we’re working on a surprise for gym class. I was thinking, what if we start doing the jitterbug in gym class? It’s good exercise and it would be a lot more fun than running laps. What do you think?” Ms. Keady – “I have heard of dance being used as an exercise in other schools. I don’t dance much, just some line dancing and slow dance from time to time. Is that something you can teach me?” Joan – “Yeah, I’m still learning, but I have it down pretty well. I think it is a good idea.” Ms. Keady – “Okay, from now on, the last fifteen minutes of the lesson is jitterbugging.” Joan finishes up her routine and pauses to find her place. While she does, Ms. Keady circles, choosing a direction from which to make her attack. Joan can thwart some of them, but she eventually gets caught in a stranglehold. Ms. Keady explains what she did wrong, and they continue. Slowly, Joan is learning not to repeat the previous mistakes. However, this lesson ends with Ms. Keady dragging Joan across the floor by the hair, “Ouch! Oh! I’m still not cutting my hair!” Ms. Keady – “Yeah, I suppose my collection of Girardi hair is becoming too big. Tomorrow, I’ll show you how to use pressure points. Let’s dance.” After school, Joan meets her friends by her locker. They all agree to meet at her house to finish their homework and work on their essays. At the Newspaper When Joan was in the second grade, news of several police officers having been shot didn’t go as well. She found out by overhearing teachers talking about it as she walked past the teachers’ lounge. Kevin found her later, staggering down the hallway, crying uncontrollably. He spent the rest of the afternoon holding her until they finally received the news that their father was all right. There have been other incidents since then, and with each one, Joan has been able to handle it better, but Kevin decided then that whenever one occurred, he would make a point to be there for her. That is why when he heard the news, he announced to Rebecca that he would be leaving early. At School After dropping by to inform Lilly of their change in dinner plans, Kevin went to the school. Joan was not surprised to see him parked outside, waiting for her, “Thank you for coming. Dad’s okay. He called and talked to Mom.” Kevin – “I know, but I came anyway.” They wait a little longer for Luke to get in, and then head for home. On the way, Joan tells Kevin that her friends will be coming over to study. Kevin wonders if her decision to study tonight is because she really needs to study, or because she really needs her friends. He decides it doesn’t matter, “Tell them to come hungry. I’m going to order a variety of sub sandwiches from the deli.” When they arrive at home, Kevin asks both of them, “Would either of you like to talk about what happened today?” Joan looks at Luke for his response, “No, I’m fine. I’ll be up in my room reading.” After Luke leaves, Joan sits beside Kevin, “I would like to talk about something, but not about today. I would actually prefer to talk to Lilly first. Is she coming to dinner?” Kevin – “Yeah, she should be here in a little while.” Joan – “Good. We need to do our studying first. Can you and Lilly wait to talk until we’re done?” Kevin – “We’ll be here.” Joan gets up and grabs her shovel and bulbs and heads out to the garage. She takes the pot she found earlier and begins to fill it with a mixture of potting soil and compost. She looks at her bag of bulbs and wonders which one to plant. They all look the same, well, almost. One has a nick on it, probably made by the shovel when she dug it up. The cut looks like the letter J. She decides that means ‘Joan’s,’ and places it in the pot. She finishes filling it, packing the soil as she goes. She then takes the pot into the kitchen and adds a little water. She smiles as she adds 7-Up for luck. In her room, she places the pot on the floor behind the stuffed chair under the window, “There, all ready for spring.” She gathers up her books and heads to the dining room. She is surprised to find Helen already sitting there, “Mom, aren’t you going to the museum tonight?” Helen – “I don’t know if I should. I’m really not in the mood.” Joan – “You should go. Dad wants you to go. Kevin’s ordering dinner. We’ll be fine.” Helen decides to take Joan’s advice. After she changes clothes, she says goodbye and leaves for the museum. Joan begins with her calculus homework, “A man wants to build a rectangular enclosure for his herd. He only has $900 to spend on the fence and…” The best answer is to call Home Depot, but unfortunately, that won’t do. She reads the rest of the problem. After some struggling, she finds the correct solution. As she begins the next problem, she hears the doorbell ring. She goes to the door and lets everyone into the foyer. However, when she begins to close the door, Lilly squeezes through, “Oh, sorry.” Joan’s eyes follow Lilly as she heads for the couch, “I’m really glad you’re here tonight.” She pauses, wondering if Lilly has met everyone, “Have you met Friedman and Glynis?” Lilly – “Yeah, we met the other day. I think you were at dance class.” Joan – “Okay.” She directs her friends to the dinning room table, “Have a seat anywhere. I’ll go get Luke.” Grace – “Sit tight, I’ll get him.” On the couch, Lilly wonders about Joan’s comment, “What did your sister mean by, ‘I’m really glad you’re here tonight?’” Kevin – “Remember when you told her that if she ever needed to talk, you would be there? Well, I think tonight’s the night.” Lilly – “Does she want to talk about the police shootings?” Kevin – “No, she heard about them at lunch. It’s something else.” Lilly gets a puzzled look on her face, “So, you don’t know about the others?” Kevin – “What others?” Lilly looks around to make sure they are alone, “All hell has broken out in Arcadia. There’s a big gun battle going on over on the west side. Two more police officers have been shot, and it’s not over yet.” Kevin thinks for a moment before responding, “Okay, no TV tonight, at least until Dad calls. There’s no need for Joan and Luke to know.” He leaves a message on Will’s cell to call home, then calls to order dinner. At the table, Joan finishes her calculus, and the others finish theirs. After they compare answers, Joan asks Luke to check her homework. Luke looks over her problems and answers, “You did good. They’re all right.” Joan smiles, pleased that she got them all right, but even more pleased that Luke is now willing to check them for her without giving her grief. They continue studying by quizzing each other on the names and locations of arteries for biology class. At the Art Museum Helen joins June, who has finished the repair of the original painting and is beginning to paint the copy. Helen looks over the original painting, “You can’t even see where it was punctured!” June – “I really enjoy being able to restore such a beautiful painting. Now comes the fun part.” As she begins to paint, she explains, “I examine a part of the painting, both actual size and magnified. Then I duplicate it on the new canvas and double check it under magnification. If I see a problem, I make touch-ups. That’s basically what I do, over and over again, until it is finished. Everything else is technique, which is just in my head.” Helen – “Can I ask questions as you work?” June – “Sure, that’s why you are here.” At Home Joan begins the discussion of their essays, “I am supporting Brian again this year. Do any of you intend to support someone else?” Glynis– “I was actually planning to vote for Sally Thornton. She’s smart and says she will listen to what people have to say.” Joan – “Okay, if you want to support Sally, then go ahead. Is there anyone else?” No one answers, so Joan continues, “Brian has a ten-point plan this year. He is his worst enemy. He’s written 75 pages. Most people are not going to read that much. There are five of us, so if each of us takes two points, summarize them in a few paragraphs, then all of them will be covered. People will read a few paragraphs. All we have to decide is which of us will do what. I would like to do the job fair, step ten. Brian wants it expanded, and I agree. There was no one from the medical industry or any fields of science last year, and he has mentioned several other fields. We need to know more about what our options might be. Why don’t all of you skim through and see if there are some that you support?” Joan walks out to the living room, “What are you guys doing?” Kevin – “Just talking. Dinner should be here soon.” Joan – “We’re almost done, thank…” The phone rings and Joan picks it up, “Hello.” Will – “Hi, Joan. How is everything there?” Joan – “Mom’s at the museum, Kevin and Lilly are here, and Luke and I are doing homework with Grace, Adam, Glynis, and Friedman. When are you coming home?” Will – “It won’t be until late. Can I talk to Kevin?” Joan – “Yeah, I love you. I’m sorry about your police officers. Here’s Kevin.” She hands the phone to Kevin. The doorbell rings, and Kevin gives her the money. She answers the door and takes dinner to the dining room table. Kevin – “I know you’re busy, but I just want to know that you are okay.” Will – “Don’t worry, I’m fine, and if your mother calls, please tell her I’m okay.” Kevin – “Can you tell me anything about what has been happening?” Will pauses, still trying to come to grips with what has happened. “The second officer from this morning died, but the two from this afternoon should be okay. I’m heading back to the hospital now. My cell doesn’t work while I’m inside, so don’t worry when it goes into voice mail.” Kevin – “Dad, I’m sorry about your officers. I’ll tell Mom you’re okay.” Kevin reports his conversation with Will to Lilly, who asks, “Are you going to tell Joan and Luke now?” Kevin considers it for a moment, “No, I’ll tell them after you and Joan talk. It’s important to her.” Lilly – “It must be important, otherwise she wouldn’t bother. I really would like to get closer to your sister, but I’m afraid I’m going to blow it.” Kevin – “You’ll do fine.” He pauses, “But not on an empty stomach. Why don’t you get us each a sub and something to drink?” At the Art Museum Helen – “You are doing such a marvelous job of duplicating this painting. I can see now how you are doing it, but I’ll need to practice your technique.” June stops for a minute and walks over to a nearby cabinet. She retrieves another easel and mounts another framed canvas, “Okay, time for you to practice.” Helen is thrilled. She lays the brush to the canvas and begins duplicating the procedure that June had used. She is pleased with the results, but she is not as skilled as June. The second duplicate progresses. At Home They all finish skimming Brian’s proposal and making a list of those items that they can support. Adam, of course, selects the math and science program, which now includes art and music. They compare their choices, and Joan is able to convince each of them to cover a different item in their essays. Glynisalso skimmed the proposal and found a few items she supported, “Tomorrow, I’m going to ask if I can support two candidates.” Joan – “The election is a week from tomorrow. I assume that’s the point of the essay, to make us make an informed choice. You need to pick one, then write your essay.” Glynisthinks for a moment, “I really like Sally better, but I like Brian’s ideas. I’ll let you know in the morning.” Joan – “Adam, can you make some posters again?” Adam – “I have two from last year in my portfolio. We can just make copies.” Joan – “Great.” That concludes their meeting, and Joan and Luke escort them to the door. After they leave, Luke goes upstairs, and Joan approaches the couch, “Lilly, can I talk to you for a few minutes?” Kevin reaches for his wheelchair and Joan quickly adds, “No, stay there. If you don’t mind, I would rather talk to Lilly in my room, privately.” Lilly joins Joan in her room, and Joan begins, “I have a question about having sex.” Lilly immediately responds, “Isn’t this something you should be talking to your mother about?” Joan – “I have already had talks with mom about sex. I know how she feels about it.” She hands Helen’s bible to Lilly, “I have heard both of you say that this is the word of God. What does he say about having sex?” Lilly looks at Joan for a long time without saying anything.Then she leafs through until she finds the page, “There are lots of places where the Bible talks about sex. Here is a passage, 1 Corinthians 6:18 – 20…” Joan interrupts, “Say that again.” As Lilly repeats it, Joan writes it down on a piece of paper, “Okay, sorry, go ahead.” Lilly – “1 Corinthians 6:18 – 20, Shun fornication! Every sin that a person commits is outside the body; but the fornicator sins against the body itself. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, which you have from God, and that you are not your own? For you were bought with a price; therefore glorify God in your body.\ ” Lilly looks up from the book, “What this is saying is that if you have sex outside of marriage, it is a sin.” Joan thinks about it for a minute, “Okay, I’ve heard ‘the body is a temple’ part before. Is there more?” Lilly – “There is a lot more. I have a whole list at home, but I don’t know if this is the best way to answer your question. You want to know about having sex before marriage, right?” Joan – “Yeah, I have already decided that I’m not having sex without the white lace and promises. I was just curious what the Bible said his almightiness wants me to do.” Lilly – “When you have sex with someone, you become married. Okay, not literally, but you are forever linked with an intimacy of the deepest kind, and it will never be erased. The two of you become one flesh. God wants sex between a man and a woman to be both a physical and a spiritual joining. It’s better to get married in front of everybody, declare your commitment, and then run with your desires, because desire is what gets you married, but it sure isn’t what will keep you married.” Joan – “What keeps you married?” Lilly – “That’s a story for another day.” Joan – “So, I should wait, right?” Lilly – “Yes, but don’t think that not having sex will protect you. It will, but it has its own set of problems. Whatever journey you decide to take will have its pitfalls. It’s your call. It’s called moral judgment, discernment, are you up to it? Joan – “I guess I’ll have to be. I’ve already made my choice.” Lilly begins to wonder, and asks, “Was this your only reason for wanting to know what the Bible says? Would you like to join your mother during her catechism lessons?” Joan – “No, thank you. I respect what you and Mom believe, but I have my own way of relating to God. I do have another question. Is it okay?” Lilly – “Sure, what is it?” Joan – “I talk to God a lot, but I was wondering. If God already knows everything I’m thinking, what is the purpose of prayer?” . Lilly – “There are lots of reasons for prayer: people pray to discuss a problem, to thank God, or just talk to God. God is always there for us. The more we pray, the stronger our relationship becomes. I pray more times than I can count in a day. I thank God or ask for wisdom. I tell Him when I’m angry, sad, happy, or confused. God is a great friend and wonderful listener. However, the most important thing is that prayer is an invitation for God to become a part of your life. Prayer does not change God, it changes us. The more he is a part of your life, the more you will begin to think and behave as he wants. It helps us to grow closer to God.” Joan – “This growing closer to God, is that like being like minded?” Lilly – “Yeah, that’s a good way of looking at it, and prayer helps you to achieve that goal.” Joan sits quietly for a moment, now understanding what God had told her, “Thank you, Lilly. You have been a great help. It’s good to have a friend who knows so much about God.” Lilly – “I’m glad I could help, but don’t put me on a pedestal. I make plenty of mistakes.” Joan – “Come on, I need to talk to Kevin.” Lilly – “Are you sure? I can wait here.” Joan – “No, I want you to come. In case you haven’t figured it out, Kevin is in love with you. You’re family.” They go back down to the living room and Lilly sits beside Kevin. Joan pushes up a chair and sits in front of them. “Kevin, I know we have talked about my feelings for Adam before, but I never told you why we broke up.” When Joan pauses briefly, Kevin interrupts, “I already know. He cheated on you.” Joan – “Who told?” Kevin – “I forced it out of Luke.” Joan is disappointed that he knew, but she continues anyway, “Well, then you know it was about sex. I wouldn’t do it and he went elsewhere. It broke my heart.” Her eyes begin to water as she continues, “I have had some conversations with Mom and Grace, and why he did it isn’t as cut and dried as I thought it was. It wasn’t just about sex. There were other reasons, and that is where it may have been partly my fault. I will never forget what he did, but recently, I have been able to see that he broke his own heart just as much as he broke mine. Even with the pain this whole time, I still love him. That has never gone away. So, I have decided to forgive him. I want to try again. I plan to tell him on Saturday, but that’s where I’m stuck. I don’t know how I should do it. Can you help?” Kevin – “What do you want to happen? Do you want to just pick up where you left off?” Joan – “No, that’s not possible, and I know it’s not going to be all hearts and bunnies. There will have to be conditions. I can’t give him my heart back, not all of it, not until I’m more sure. But part of my heartache is missing him. I want him back. I need him back.” Lilly – “Maybe you should make a list. Write down what you would like to say to him, and what you would like to happen between you in the future. Think about your list and then throw the list away.” Joan – “Throw it away?” Lilly – “If you tell Adam something you’ve memorized, it will sound fake, and he’ll know it. Know what you want to say, but how you say it must be spontaneous. It has to come from your heart.” Kevin – “I don’t think I could have said it better.” Joan smiles and gives them both a kiss on the cheek. As she begins to leave, Kevin stops her, “Wait, I have something to tell you.” He looks at Lilly, “Will you call Luke?” After Luke arrives, Kevin continues, “Dad’s okay, but there are things you should know. You’ll find out about them anyway.” Both Joan and Luke remember the similar line from Mrs. Polonsky at Lake Nashman, “The second officer that was shot this morning died. There have also been two more police shootings, but Dad thinks they will be okay.” Luke – “Do you know who the police officers are?” Kevin – “I wish I knew more, but that’s all I know. The news will be on soon. Would you like to watch?” Joan says no, but Luke decides to watch. Then Helen walks in the door, “Hi. Joan and Luke, what are you still doing up? You should be in bed.” Kevin – “Mom, there is something you should know.” He tells her what he just told Joan and Luke. They all decide to sit and watch the news together. The reporter begins by talking about the shootings from this morning, ‘Those involved in the shootings were Officer Hector Garcia, Officer Ashley Turner, Anthony Rizzo, and Theodore Marks. Officer Turner and Anthony Rizzo died at the scene, Theodore Marks died on the way to the hospital, and Officer Garcia died while in surgery. Details of the shootings are still under investigation. This afternoon, the police raided a warehouse at 1213 West Gilmore Street . An exchange of gunfire occurred and continued for several hours. Officer Brian Walker and Officer Tyron Drake received gunshot wounds. Officer Drake is in stable condition and Officer Walker was treated and released. Two suspects were killed and three were injured. Fourteen others were arrested. Their names have not yet been released…’ Helen – “I don’t think I have met any of them, but this has certainly been a terrible day for your father.” Joan – “Officer Garcia is the one who arrested me. I didn’t like being arrested, but he treated me okay. I feel bad for him and his family. And Teddy Marks hung around the high school a lot selling drugs. He was a real slime.” Helen – “You knew a drug dealer?” Joan – “I just knew who he was. I don’t do drugs.” Kevin – “I’ve met Officer Turner a few times at the courthouse. She seemed nice. And I think I’ve met Sergeant Drake a couple of times.” Luke – “I didn’t know any of them, either.” Lilly – “I knew Ashley when I was still a nun. She used to attend St. Peter’s. I haven’t seen her in quite a while.” Helen – “Well, Joan and Luke, it’s late. You need to go to bed.” They all get up, and Helen remembers something, “Oh, I’ve invited the Goetzmann’s to dinner next Saturday. Can you and Lilly come?” Kevin looks at Lilly, trying to sense her response, and then looks back to Helen, “Yeah, I think so. Wayne, Dan, Dad, and I are already set to golf in the morning. Dinner shouldn’t be a problem.” Helen – “Good. Joan, Elizabeth will be coming too. You still like her, right?” Joan – “Yeah, she’s okay.” Helen – “Okay, off to bed.” Lilly goes home and they all go up to their bedrooms. Kevin e-mails the story to Henry Taschen and begins to wonder if censorship at the newspaper is just beginning. He goes to sleep. Luke thinks about the mess this police thing has been and falls to sleep thinking about chaos theory. Joan says a prayer for those hurt and killed, and she asks God to take care of them. She falls asleep. Helen lays in bed, worrying about Will. Finally, she goes to sleep as well. At about one thirty, Will opens the door to Joan’s room. He walks in and is about to lean over to give her a goodnight kiss when she says, “Dad, I’m sorry about all of your police officers. I said a prayer for them.” Startled to realize that Joan is awake, Will replies, “Thank you, Joan. I’m sure it will help.” He gives her a kiss, “Go back to sleep.” In the morning, the zombies arise. Not one of them has had a decent night’s sleep. Helen makes the decision, “I think we should all call in sick. Will and Kevin, why don’t you call in late? Then we can all go back to bed for some well-deserved sleep.” At the Police Station Prior to coming to work, Will stopped by the hospital to say hello to Officer Drake. Officer Drake was given the good news that he will be released today. He will be returning to work on Monday. Toni’s find at Anthony Rizzo’s apartment led them to the warehouse on the west side. The suspects were more heavily armed than they expected, but at least now, a major drug dealer in Arcadia has been shut down. Carlisle’s search of Teddy Marks’ residence brought little regarding drugs, but he found something even more interesting. “Will, I need to show you something.” He hands Will an envelope of photo prints, “This is a set of double prints taken from Marks’ home. We found it wedged between his desk and the wall. Take a look at the last three prints.” Will looks at the pictures and sits stunned. He looks up at Carlisle, “Why would Teddy Marks have pictures of Judith Montgomery?” Carlisle– “I don’t know, but there are two prints of each picture, but only one of Judith’s. The second copies of these prints have been removed.” He takes the envelope back and pulls out a photo from the pack, “Do you recognize this kid?” Will – “Yeah, but I can’t place him.” Carlisle– “He was the star quarterback on Arcadia High’s football team last year. His name is Lars Klosterman. I’m going to talk to him now.” Will – “Call me afterward. I want to know what he says.” At School Joan is pleased to see posters of Brian Beaumont all over the school. She and Luke find everyone in the cafeteria, “Thanks everyone for putting up the posters. Adam, they look even better than they did last year.” Adam – “When I got home last night, I decided to make new copies of them. I added some more texture. That makes them stand out more.” Grace – “I think we all know why you’re late today. Are you all right?” Luke – “Yeah, we knew my dad was okay, but none of us could sleep anyway.” Joan – “We knew some of the officers, and it’s hard when something like this happens.” Glynis– “Would it make you feel a little better to know that I’m now supporting Brian? Friedman and I are writing our essays tonight. You want to join us?” Joan – “I’m glad you’re supporting Brian, but no, I want to spend time with my dad tonight. I’ll probably write mine on Sunday.” Later, Grace and Joan are walking down the hall, “Adam told me about your trip to Mercer Creek. You’ve been spending a lot of time together lately. Are you two becoming an item again?” Joan – “I don’t know, I’ll find out tomorrow. Are you still going to see Alice and Glynis?” Grace – “Yeah, Luke, Friedman, and I are going together.” Joan – “Great! You’ll know then, and we can talk on Sunday.” Today’s lesson on pressure points was mostly instruction, but Joan and Ms. Keady did finish it with a practice. As a result, Joan leaves the gym with a slight limp, but Mrs. Keady won’t be using her right hand for some time. They decided to forgo the dance portion of the lesson today. At the Police Station Carlisleknocks on Will’s door, “Will, do you have a minute?” Will – “I thought you were going to call.” Carlisle– “This is big; I figured we needed to talk in person. Lars was very cooperative. Here’s what he told me. He and Teddy Marks were lovers. Judith took a picture of them kissing using her cell phone. They were both upset about it, but Teddy was really mad. Eventually, Judith agreed to delete the picture, and Lars saw her do it. He told Teddy, and he figured that was the end of it. Then, when Judith was murdered, Lars asked Teddy if he did it. Teddy told Lars no, but Lars wasn’t sure if he believed him. Then when the police said it was Joey Edwards who killed Judith, he figured Teddy was telling the truth. They broke up last January, and they haven’t spoken since.” Will – “Did anyone else know about the picture?” Carlisle– “Lars said he was sure no one else knew about it.” Will – “It sounds like Judith may have been set up. See if you can find out what happened to Judith’s cell phone. Also, look up that lawyer for Ryan Peters, Catherine something. I want him in here again for questioning.” At Home After dinner, Joan invites her father to play a game of chess, “You wanted a rematch. Come on, let’s play.” The game took longer than usual, but Will was finally able to checkmate Joan’s king, “Well, it’s good to know I haven’t totally lost my touch.” Joan gives him a hug and a kiss and congratulates him on his victory. Later, Will and Helen prepare for bed, “Did you enjoy your game with Joan?” Will – “Yeah, and it was great to finally win one.” Helen hesitates before responding, “She let you win.” Will – “What do you mean, I just played a better game tonight.” Helen – “She told me she was going to let you win before you started. She wants you to be happy again. She knows how bad you feel about all the shootings.” Will is stunned, disappointed that he didn’t actually win, but happy that Joan would do such a thing. Helen – “Don’t you dare tell her that I told you.” At Mercer Creek Paxis sitting between them, with her head on Joan’s lap. Joan is petting her and enjoying the view. The trees are a kaleidoscope of color, just like last year. She can feel Judith, which makes missing her a little easier. She remembers what’s over the next hill, “Are you ready, Adam?” Adam – “Yeah, I remember.” They crest the hill and Joan sees the stable in the dell. She puts her hand out of the window to wave, but is shocked by what she sees, “Adam, pull over.” She looks at the horse with amazement, “It’s so sad and wonderful at the same time. I can’t believe how beautiful he is.” Adam – “Whoever restored him did an excellent job. Every detail is so real, and the stable and the other buildings have been painted, too. I guess we can’t call him Ole Paint anymore.” Joan considers Adam’s comment for a moment, “No, he will always be Ole Paint to me.” When they arrive and begin to collect their things, Pax suddenly darts off. Adam calls her, but she continues running. She heads toward a new wooden play structure, and Joan and Adam quickly follow. When they arrive, they find Pax has pinned down a little girl. She is laughing and giggling as Pax relentlessly licks her face. Still laughing, she says, “Hi, Joan, is this your dog?” Joan – “No, it’s Adam’s dog. What are you doing here?” God ignores her question, “Hi, Adam, I’m Julie. I love your dog. Can I play with her?” Adam – “It looks like you already are. Her name is Pax.” Adam pauses, trying to decide what to say next. He doesn’t want to be rude, but he really wants to spend time alone with Joan, “Where are your parents?” God – “The camping area is just over there.” She picks up a stick and throws it. Pax darts off to retrieve it. Joan – “Maybe we should ask them about it first.” She looks at Adam, “Why don’t you get the picnic basket and blanket and take it to our spot. Pax and I will meet you there in a few minutes.” Adam heads back to the truck, while Joan and God walk across the field toward the camping area, “Please don’t tell me not to do this. I really want it.” God – “That’s not why I’m here. Besides, it’s your choice.” Joan – “Yeah, but what about the like minded thing? I finally figured out what you meant. Is it what you want for me too?” God – “I just want you to be happy.” Joan – “God, I really need to know. You said that more and more often, I am making the same choices that you would have made for me. That implies that sometimes I don’t make the right choice. Is this choice the right one?” God – “I can’t make your choices for you. You have to follow your heart. What do your dreams tell you?” Joan – “They’re confusing. I don’t know if they’re dreams or just wishes. Are they my dreams or our dreams?” God takes the stick from Pax and throws it again, “Joan, you still need to learn to have faith in yourself. What did your father tell you the other day?” Joan thinks for a moment, trying to decide to what God is referring, “Trust my instincts?” God – “Bingo! I love that word. You already have more guidance in this matter than most people would have, but it has to be your choice.” She again takes the stick from Pax and throws it, “You know, Pax loves both Adam and you.” Joan – “Changing the subject, are we?” God ignores her, “Pax will do anything to protect you, even give up her own life.” Joan – “What are you saying?” God – “Dogs don’t have free will like you. You may have to make decisions for her. I have to go. Have fun today.” Joan – “Wait! What are you talking about?” God walks off with a wave, leaving Joan standing there with Pax. Joan takes the stick from Pax and throws it in the direction of the truck. At the Craft Show Kevin, Lilly, Rebecca, and Dan meet at the craft show. It’s not long before Lilly and Rebecca pair off, talking about the different crafts they see. Kevin and Dan sort of tag along, talking about places they would rather be; however, they come across a woodworking exhibit that catches both of their interests. Lilly and Rebecca continue ahead. Rebecca – “Now that we’re alone, I want you to know that there’s nothing going on between Kevin and me. That was a long time ago.” Lilly – “Well, I’m glad to hear that. How are you and Dan doing?” Rebecca – “We have only been dating a few months, but I like him a lot.” Then she adds, “But nothing serious yet.” Now that they have gotten that out in the open, they actually begin to connect with one another. At Mercer Creek When she arrives, Adam has already laid out the blanket. He has wedged himself in Judith’s tree, and the memory pleases her. She takes his hand and they watch leaves float down the stream for the longest time, “I so love this spot.” Adam – “Me too. What happened to Julie?” Joan – “I convinced her parents to take her on a nature walk. I would like to plant Judith’s crocuses now. Would you like to help?” Adam was hoping she would ask, but he didn’t know if she wanted to do this alone, “Sure, let’s go.” They walk a little way and find an open grassy area that doesn’t appear to be mowed. Joan sticks the shovel in the ground, “This looks like a nice spot.” However, Pax seems to prefer another spot. She digs a hole a few yards away. Joan decides to take Pax’s advice and places a bulb in the hole, and then Adam covers it back up. Pax digs another hole, and they repeat the procedure. After the fourth bulb is planted, Pax digs yet another hole. Joan looks at Adam, “How do we turn her off? I’m out of bulbs.” Adam picks up a stick and throws it toward the picnic area, “You distract her. It’s easy to do.” Adam covers up the hole, and they return to their spot by the creek, “What’s for lunch?” Joan – “I had Dad help me create these monster sandwiches: salami, lettuce, tomato, cheese, mayonnaise, olives, and I have pickles in a bag if you want to add them. They should be great.” Adam – “They sound good. Are you hungry yet?” Joan – “Yeah, I didn’t have much for breakfast.” She takes the sandwiches, sodas, and chips out of the basket, and they quietly eat their lunch. After they are finished, they lay down on the blanket and Pax parks herself between them. “Adam…” She pauses, trying to get her thoughts together, “I want to talk to you about something.” Adam doesn’t answer; he just gives her his attention, “Last spring when you had sex with Bonnie, it really broke my heart.” Adam – “I know, I was really stupid.If I could take it back, I would. I’m so, so sorry that I hurt you.” Adam looks deep into Joan’s eyes, “I love you.” Joan is pleased to have finally received a heartfelt apology, “I know, that’s why I would like to try again.” Adam – “You won’t be sorry. I promise, I’ll never do anything like that again.” Adam once again looks deep into her eyes, and she can see that he means it. Joan – “There is something else that you need to know. I’m not having sex with you! I’ll only give all of me, body and soul, to the man I marry. You’ll have to live with that. Can you?” Adam – “We are talking about sex, not marriage. I love you. Sex makes the connection.” Joan – “Lilly says that boys want sex and give love to get it. Girls want love and give sex to get it. His Holiness wants sex to be both a physical and a spiritual connection. I’m not some dog you can just hook up with.” Adam – “Joan, I would never think of you like that.” Joan – “Then why did you hook up with Bonnie?” Adam is startled by her question, “Well, I guess you are right, although I never loved Bonnie. It was just sex.” Joan – “Boys should be hosed down with cold water every hour.” Adam – “Yeah, you’re right. It almost destroyed me, and it destroyed us.” Joan – “We’re destroyed?” Adam – “Yeah, but something new can be reborn, right?” Joan – “Yeah.” Adam – “What you’re asking is going to be really hard. Do you have any idea how many times I have dreamed of making love to you?” Joan – “Adam, I know, and I have the same urges and dreams as you, but I believe this is what God wants me to do. If we have sex, I just know the ripples will be bad. I want only good ripples for us. This is not going to be easy for me either. I’m going to need you to help. You have to be with me on this.” Adam – “If I agree, you’ll let me have your heart?” Joan – “I will open my heart to you again, but you will have to earn my trust. And I can’t promise where it will lead, only that the opportunity will be there.” Adam takes a few moments to consider, “I want you to love me more than anything in the world. I’ll try not to push the sex-thing, but you have to remember the hose and to say no.” This time, Joan initiates the kiss, but they are interrupted. Pax has been quietly lying between them, but now she begins a low growl. Joan looks at her, “Don’t you like us kissing?” Paxrises up and continues to growl. She stealthily walks between them toward the bushes a few yards away. The hair on her back begins to stand up, and she growls and snarls even louder. Both Joan and Adam now realize that something is very wrong. Joan remembers what God told her, “Adam, call her back, call her back, now!” Adam decides to heed her advice, “Pax, come here.” Initially, Pax refuses to leave the proximity of the bushes, but Adam repeats the call until finally, she comes. While Adam was calling Pax, Joan was collecting their things, “Come on, we’re leaving.” They return to the truck and head for home. Adam – “What do you suppose was behind the bushes?” Joan – “I don’t know, but I think we did the right thing by leaving.” Adam turns on the radio and the song “If” begins to play. He takes her hand and they quietly hold hands the rest of the way home.